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Feel Good Factors

     This painting class is shining light deeper than is comfortable. I’ve been around art for years but am discovering I’m not near as good as I thought. Always being around non-artist people it looked pretty good, but around those in the know knew there wasn’t much discipline. They saw through. But I like the accolades. I always remember Connie sharing one time that in an exercise class of 80-years-olds she looks pretty good and felt pretty good.

     I recently spoke with a fellow that blew off the whole eliminating-single-use plastic-bag program as simply a feel-good factor that really isn’t making a dent. He compared it to the Third World countries that use single-use everything (because of poverty I assumed), and the Amazon giants that are belching out hectares of indestructible waste, not to mention 99% of all grocery packaging is in plastic or styrofoam doesn’t make a dent. I saw his point.

     So that got me thinking about other feel-factors that stroke my ego but not much more. I can get intoxicated on the feel-good factors. But it sounds like prime enemy ground to me. A foothold. Opportunities to exploit. Allowing my feel-good to slide into obsession, righteousness, and its-all-up-to-me and I becoming too important. Until fed up, overwhelmed and a bad case of the why-bothers are firmly entrenched. Now who does that sound like?

     So what’s the antidote? The Paraclete, the Spirit of truth. The Holy Spirit will bear witness to the spirit of truth in me. And like Peter, it’s all about keeping the eyes on the Lord not the storm. Yes I do my part, and keep the feel-good activity alive, but allowing the Spirit of truth his say, His direction - if I want to be in His will for me.

     I can name numerous ways feeding my ego has spun out of control in my life - being inspiring, being an artist, being a writer, being creative - all those hats. But I need to constantly remind myself where I got all the energy to do it from in the first place and not be shy to give credit where credit is due.

     So keeping that balance, first between my ears, knowing who is really in charge, and then in my heart, it’s really God’s job. I just need to abide in him. ‘Present moment abiding in his love’ as Jean would say it.

     So when my knee jerk reaction is to blow someone off because they

think completely contrary to me or to current public opinion, I have to pause. Because upon reflection, there is probably a light shining a deeper to something that never occurred to me.


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